Dave Dorman Confidential: Why I Don’t Attend DragonCon (via Dave Dorman)

Controversial? Yes. Honest? Yes.

Dear Friends, First, let me post my upcoming appearances, so it's front and center: * Detroit Fan Fare Days 9/23 – 9/25, 2011 * Dallas for Star Wars Fan Days 10/8 – 10/9, 2011 * SteamCon in Seattle 10/15 – 10/16 My longtime friend and award-winning sci-fi/horror writer Del Stone Jr. has held my secret for all of these years. As DragonCon started growing its attendance trajectory and publicity, more and more people have asked me if, when and why I … Read More

via Dave Dorman

Nature v. Nurture: The Apple That Didn’t Drop Far From the Tree

Gentle Readers,

Most of you following me know that I’m married to a famed artist and illustrator, Dave Dorman. However, unless you grew up with me, you likely aren’t aware that I, too, was a gifted artist in my youth. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a mentor like Dave to explain to me that there was “gold in them thar mines…” or real career opportunities for artists and illustrators.  Today Dave goes to grade schools, high schools and colleges and lectures students on career opportunities for the arts. I just wasn’t that savvy.  I knew no one who did art, outside of my art teachers, and there was  no way in hell I was going to suffer that level of abuse.  (Well, I did do a 3-year stint as a Sunday School teacher and was pretty good at it, but I digress).  With the residue from too much ’70s Woodward & Bernstein influence, I ventured forth into a “safer” creative field–writing.

So jump ahead a few decades, and here Dave and I are with a six-year-old son who is clearly showing artistic ability – freakishly so – and we are occasionally flabbergasted by his burgeoning talent. Yesterday was just such an example. Our son turned six this week, and we watched him draw this image below freehand, with no reference to copy. It was simply drawn from his memory. The character he drew, Cosmo from Nickelodeon’s The Fairly OddParents, was perfect in detail, according to Dave, who is well familiar with the character.  I cannot bear to watch that painful show, so I’m no expert. So here it is. Judge for yourself if this looks like the art of a six-year-old:

Dave Dorman's Son Shows Artistic Talent at Age Six

Left to his own devices, our son will choose to sit down and draw rather than watch TV or play videogames. While we praise his efforts, we haven’t given him any formal art training. Dave has insisted we give him the freedom to find his own “voice” in his art. Dave was in his early 20s when he found his voice, and that has worked out well so far, so I’m thinking this is the best approach.  But what do I know? What do you think?

As always, thanks for reading.

Denise

Twitter.com/writebrainmedia

Linkedin.com/in/writebrainmedia

Stainless & Granite: The Unenlightened Think It’s the New Black in Kitchen Design

In some households, the cacophony of couch potatoes screaming at the flat screen might smack of football season. At our house, it means I’m watching my favorite new porn: HGTV’s House Hunters, or its skinnier, richer and even bee-yotchier sister, House Hunters International.

Today was House Hunters International’s HGTV marathon. (I guess they don’t think my ass is big enough already, so they’re adding several hours to my non-aerobic activity). Imagine my delight and surprise when interviewing world-renowned artist Scott Hampton for Dave Dorman’s & my podcast, “It’s Comic Book Day” (free on iTunes, folks!) and discovering that he, too, shares my addiction. Scott summed it up best: “Who knew you could buy a chateau in the south of France for a mere $500,000?!?”

I’ve learned much from observing – and cursing out – these clueless home buyers. Are you selling a home in the near future? Take careful note. The new rules for staging homes can be summarized in a couple of bullet points:

#1. People today are way too stupid to notice the true and lovely bones of a home and the potential of its land. They will NOT see past the paint palette or wallpaper that somehow offends their precious sensibilities, so keep that wall cover neutral, folks! Just take your paint cues from some old Pottery Barn catalog (don’t worry, the catalog can be from 10 years ago and the design won’t have evolved at all) and be sure to fill a giant, useless and extravagantly expensive clear vase (say it like you’re from Connecticut and pronounce it “vaahhhzzz”) with useless balls that look like Martha Stewart rolled up some brown old grape vines after her Kobe beef herd shat on them. Wall colors can be khaki, ecru and egg shell. Don’t get too imaginative. Wall art must always be framed in black.

#2. The home could have a crumbling foundation and the most labyrynthine layout, but so long as that kitchen boasts “stainless steel appliances and granite countertops,” that home is…to quote our moronic ex-Illinois Guv Blago…”Effing GOLDEN!!!”

Every single time I see some uninformed couple walk into a kitchen and gush over stainless and granite, I scream at the TV. I’m confident Dave jests when he tells me I learned English from “longshoremen,” whatever that means. Surely Tony Robbins is intricately involved in some conspiracy…like the kitchen design lobbyists got to him, and the next brainwashing session he held down at his Fiji compound was dedicated to selling future home buyers on bad 1998 kitchen decor. Do these people just really not know what a pain in the ass it is to keep fingerprints off of stainless?!? Or how easily stainless steel appliances dent?!? Or how dated these kitchens are going to look in no time?!?

When I think of these house hunters, I can’t help but think of the lyric from The Police’s most excellent album, Synchronicity: “Packed like lemmings into shiny, metal boxes…contestants in a suicidal race.” But these house hunting lemmings are all converging toward one giant design suicide. From everything I’ve witnessed over countless episodes, home buyer individuality is deader than Paris Hilton’s welcome mat at LasVegas Wynn Properties.

All this talk of The Police has made me, in my true A.D.D. fashion, think of the hottest Baby Boomer on the planet, Sting. He should have at least a cameo role on my favorite vampire porn, True Blood. Don’t you agree?

Dave Dorman Interviews Alien & Predator

Dear Friends,

I wrote this parody piece a while back, prior to AVP2 coming out with the “new” Predalien character, if you catch my drift. Dave did a “very similar” creature design as a work-for-hire project for 20th Century Fox years ago, and it became a little controversial when he noted online that the Predalien design in AVP2 was virtually identical to the one he created, and then he proceeded to post both of them for the fans to compare.  I’ve updated the interview a little, but here it is:

Dave Dorman Interviews Alien & Predator

Back Story: Renowned illustrator Dave Dorman, Alien and Predator are old friends, dating back more than 15 years ago to the days when Dorman was painting Alien v. Predator pieces to please the Dark Horse fans…today the threesome reunites for a pre-San Diego Comic-Con interview.

POV: We see the famed Eisner Award-winning  illustrator and two of his favorite creatures, lunching at a local White Castle.

Dave Dorman: Hi guys. Thanks for wearing pants today.

Alien & Predator (in unison): Ditto.

Dave Dorman: Let’s Q&A. How did you like being depicted as warring nemeses in your new film, Alien v. Predator?

Alien: Well, the fans have been dying to see me kick Predator’s ass in a live action piece…

Predator, interrupting: Hold on a ****in’ minute. Whose ass did they want to see getting kicked by who?

Alien, continuing: I believe the correct word is whom…but Dave, you were the first one who actually depicted us dukin’ it out more than 15 years ago in your painting for Dark Horse Presents #36. It was that first fight cover in the swamp, remember?

Predator: That’s right! You made us fly down to your Florida studio and sweat our balls off posing under all of those hot lights. In the middle of summer, no less! That was the modeling job from hell. Just for that, you’re buying lunch today. And I’ll take an extra sack of sliders for the ride home.

Dave Dorman: Nada, Rasta-boy; you can afford to pay your own way! But that particular cover has been one of the most popular from my fans–and yours. You have to admit, Predator, you seemed to enjoy posing with that hot babe on the cover I did for Alien v. Predator #4.

Predator: Nah, she didn’t do it for me. Though I did like that slinky, latex costume.

POV: We see Predator struggling to fit a milkshake straw into his etiquette-unfriendly mouth.

Dave Dorman: Havin’ some trouble, Predator? Let me help.

POV: Dorman’s hand shakes nervously as he pours the vanilla milkshake into Predator’s gaping pie hole.

Dave Dorman: Hey guys, remember when I worked on those designs for that first attempt at the Alien v. Predator movie over 12 years ago? Did I ever show you my hybrid Predalien character?

POV: We see Dorman revealing the Predalien illustration to an astounded Alien and Predator.

Predator (sniffs with disdain): That is sick and wrong…unnatural. Not to mention chromosomally impossible.

Alien (lighting a cigarette): Humans shouldn’t be playing God with the mother race.

POV: Predator slaps the cigarette out of Alien’s mouth and his long claws rake against Alien’s jaw.  A few drops of blood drip onto White Castle’s stainless steel table, hissing as they burn steaming holes through it, then the floor.

Predator: Alien! How many times do I have to tell you? There’s no smoking in California restaurants! Besides I didn’t bring my inhaler.

Alien: Thanks, pal. There goes my goddam product placement cash from the tobacco industry.

Dave Dorman: You know, Alien, I have this persistent rust stain in my toilet and I’ll bet a few drops of your blood would take it right out.

Predator: I’m bettin’ it’s not a rust stain…

Dave Dorman (indignant): Niiiiice. And to think I painted your flattering side in that jail scene for the Predator: Race War piece!

Alien: He doesn’t have a good side. He’s a ****in’ four-toothed freak!

Predator (growling): Wrap it up, Dorman. I’m not sitting much longer with this slimed up gene pool abortion.

Dave Dorman: Right. So, guys, what do you think of my WASTED LANDS series?

Alien: I got your RAIL graphic novel, which definitely had some slick Schuiten and European influences, but my agent’s been hanging onto my complimentary copy of THE UNINVITED. He wants some cool beach reading in case Danny Devito and Rhea Perlman ever invite him over to their private Malibu sands.

Dave Dorman (offering Alien his book): Ah, well here’s an extra copy for you.

Alien: Thanks, man.

Predator: I thought the artwork and the stories kicked ass–just like I do with Alien on a regular basis–HAH!–however, I noticed you didn’t write any parts for me or Alien into your new series.

Alien: Yeah, we’re a little hurt. Remember, I helped you win that Eisner Award for your graphic story album Aliens: Tribes. Nice work with writer Steve Bissette…

Dave Dorman: I’d include you guys in a New York minute, but you have that contractual thing happenin’ with your movie studio. Since you liked the artwork, I’ll forward both of you my new book, “ROLLING THUNDER: The Art of Dave Dorman” from IDW Publishing and Desperado Publishing. It’s a career retrospective, including my pieces of you guys, plus my other licensed work and my Wasted Lands project.

Predator: Cool. Let me leave you with my home address this time so my agent doesn’t permanently borrow my copy.

Alien: What else ya’ got cookin’, paint-boy?

Dave Dorman: Promise not to get pissed?

Alien: I’m not promising anything except for some seriously stale White Castle farts in your rented van for the ride back to the studio.

Dave Dorman: Okay, let me reiterate, I would have written you in if I could…

Predator (nods, knowingly) to Alien: He’s stalling…

Dave  Dorman: Well…it’s a new Wasted Lands sci-fi action adventure novel, featuring my popular character Iguana, called…just don’t get mad, guys… “A Thousand Angry Teeth.”

Alien hisses (dripping with slime and sarcasm): Gee, I wonder who inspired that title?

Predator to Alien: Last time I checked with the dentist, you weren’t the only one with a mouthful of sharp teeth, you cocky bastard!

Alien (revealing menacing, dripping teeth, slowly rising up from his chair): That ****in’ does it!

Dave Dorman: Hey, look!!! Isn’t that Harold and Kumar at the White Castle drive thru’?!?

POV: Alien and Predator–both cursed with short attention spans–look toward the drive thru’ window, distracted just long enough for Dorman’s quick get-away. Dorman flips them some cab money as he casually exits the fine dining establishment, relishing the fact that his van will be Alien fart-free for the drive home. Approaching sirens wail, tables overturn, plate glass windows shatter and fry jockeys quiver beneath the stainless steel counter at the White Castle as Alien and Predator stage their own private, kick-ass sequel. Were it not for the 20^th Century Fox-licensed monsters, it would definitely resemble a scene from Dorman’s action-packed sci-fi series, The Wasted Lands. Don’t believe it? See for yourself:

http://www.wastedlands.com.

Comic Book Art “Dream Team” Launches COMIX ACADEMY

Artists Get One-on-One Mentoring and Portfolio Reviews with Top Comic Book Editors

San Diego, CA–March 3, 2010—Five comic book illustrators with super hero-like artistic abilities have teamed up to use their powers for good–helping others realize their dream projects. Dave Dorman, Scott Hampton, Christopher Moeller, Durwin Talon, and John Van Fleet will be teaching Comix Academy, six days of intense instruction dedicated to helping illustrators break into the comics market. Joining them as Comix Academy’s very first special guest presenter will be Mike Mignola.

The workshops will be held in San Diego July 15 through July 20th, dovetailing with the start date of San Diego Comic-Con. The mission of the Comix Academy is to “provide guidance to students in a way that wasn’t available to me when I was trying to find my way in the comics industry,” explained co-founder and #1 Star Wars Artist Dave Dorman.

“We’ve assembled some of the best storytellers in the business to share their talents from visual storytelling and concept work to painting and 3D art. It’s going to be an exciting week!” said co-founder Durwin Talon, educator and author of “Panel Discussions” a book exploring the design of sequential art storytelling by Two Morrows Publishing. Added co-founder Scott Hampton, “The Comix Academy is about focusing on specifics. We have six days and we want them to count, so we’re concentrating on where the attendees are right now with their art. We’ll show students what we’re doing, but just as importantly, we’ll see what they’re doing, what their goals are. I look forward to helping our students polish and improve the art they bring with them.”

To that end, the Comix Academy team will help students prepare their work for the comics and illustration industry, and culminate the course with a final day receiving one-on-one portfolio reviews with world-class comic book editors.

The early registration fee for the course is $950 before April 30th, 2010 and $1,150 after May 1, 2010. Discounts on lodging are also available to students. For more information or media inquiries, please contact 630.845.4694, email denise@writebrainmedia.com or visit http://www.comixacademy.com.

Media Contact:

Denise Dorman

WriteBrain Media

Phone 24/7: 630.845.4694

Email: denise@writebrainmedia.com

Twitter: @writebrainmedia

LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/writebrainmedia

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